This is the last full day that Grady lived.
It was also the day that I 'most disobeyed' Dr. Joe's orders.
Over the weekend, I had rested. I checked my blood pressure incessantly. It was fine. No swelling. Everything seemed great. Other than the normal discomforts of pregnancy, that is.
So, on the morning of November 10th, a Monday, Jessica rode with the neighbor to school, and I decided that I wanted to drive Emma Grace to preschool. Her school is five minutes away. I honestly didn't see the harm in it. (Did I mention before that nurses are the worst patients?!) It wasn't stressful. It wasn't far. There was no traffic. I didn't even have to get out of the van. Drop her off and head back home.
And that's exactly what I did. And once home, I rested, again, in the recliner and on the sofa. Watched tv and dozed.
At 11:30, I went to pick her up. I didn't go in...I just pulled up to her teacher's door and into the van she came.
Then it was home for lunch and more snuggling with my baby girl. Resting until 2pm when my friend and neighbor, Nicole, came over to help me with some things around the house. She did this several times and it was amazing how many orders I could bark out in that one hour before the bus came. We talked about what was left to do and decided we would finish the nursery the next day and get his clothes sorted and organized. The bassinet was already set up in our room, and the car seat was in the van.
Gib came home from work that afternoon with a pile of food from some of his wonderful clerks/secretaries. We enjoyed a delicious meal. Grady was as active as ever. Seemed to be pretty happy in there, kicking and hiccuping away.
After dinner, I sat in the recliner and wrote thank you notes for Gib to take with him the next day. I didn't want to wait because I didn't think I'd have much time after Grady arrived...
As I recall, the night seemed pretty uneventful after that. Baths (which I did not give), bedtime stories and songs (which I did participate in) and off to bed we all went. Still in shock that I had made it so far and that we were only four days away from having Baby Grady here with us...
I missed seeing the people from my regular support group last night, but I have to tell you that I truly enjoyed the new one I attended. There were some deeply broken hearts around that table and tears were shed, for sure. I was not sure, at first, that I had come to the right place when I arrived because everyone seemed older than me. But when the meeting started and the facilitator shared her story, she had experienced a stillbirth 19 years ago with her first baby girl...
I relaxed after that.
I was received well, welcomed with love and parted with hugs. The drive was much closer, although I can't say nicer. I was traveling about 60 miles per hour when a deer tried to run in front of me. I'm so thankful I dodged that accident! Thank you Lord!
It's been a miserably rainy day here again. We've gotten so much rain the last two months it's unbelievable. I love to hear the rain and love to stay inside. But staying inside is not an option with a puppy without a fenced backyard!
It was the kind of day where I changed our typical Tuesday night dinner plan from pizza to homemade broccoli-cheese soup with some hot, crusty french bread. It was delicious and was just what we needed for a cold, rainy day.
The biggest problem with the rain is that our roof is leaking. We have vaulted ceilings in our family room which makes it hard to get in the attic and over to where the problem is. Gib managed to get up there and find the leak. He tried to patch the problem, 'put a band aid on it' as he called it, but he's quite stressed. Which is making me stressed. We're not sure where the problem is coming from on the outside, and a new roof is not in our budget right now.
At least we didn't have any feet coming through the ceiling tonight!
I had a great afternoon with my girls today. Since it was raining there was no playing outside. They came home and we had some hot chocolate together before starting homework. Watching the rain...Talking...Just being together... I loved it! And let me tell you, if you haven't tried Nestle's 'Chocolate Caramel' Hot Chocolate you must very soon! If you like caramel, that is. Emma Grace wanted regular but me and Jessica had it and it was yummo-delicioso!
That's all I have for tonight. I'm honestly not looking forward to tomorrow.
It's the day he went to heaven.
I'll post about that some time tomorrow.
One day at a time...