Pumpkin Pics (and Buddy, too!)

I wanna go deep tonight. But I can't. I can't because 1) I can't choose which "deep" topic to blog about, and 2) I don't have the energy to go there. I have a feeling that I'll be going pretty "deep" the next couple of weeks...

'Cuz that's how I'm feeling these days.

My thoughts are jumbled. My heart is heavy. My feelings are hurt. I'm feeling a bit lonely and betrayed by people I thought I was close to. I'm overwhelmed by even the simple things in life. Will it ever get better?

So, on a lighter note, I'll just share pumpkin pictures with you!

We went to the pumpkin patch yesterday, and Jessica brought this one to me. She said, "Mama, this looks like a good Baby Grady pumpkin doesn't it?"



To be honest, I wasn't planning to get one for him. But we did. How could I resist when Jessica thought of it all on her own? She does surprise me at times because she isn't as vocal about Grady as Emma Grace. But I'm convinced she thinks about him just as much! We're planning to put a candle on top of it tomorrow night when we light the others.




It's a tradition that Gib carves the pumpkins with the girls. I'm the picture-taker, and Gib gets to do all of the work. Thankfully Gib enjoys it and is willing to do it because I would have NO idea where to start!







Jessica wanted a spider. Emma Grace wanted her pumpkin to look like this...



Here's how they turned out. (I realized as I was posting these that I didn't get a good view of the designs so I'll do that tomorrow)



Jessica is planning to dress up as an "umpa lumpa" and Emma Grace will be a ladybug (we bought her costume last year but she was sick so she agreed to be one again this year). I'll post pictures of their costumes after trick-or-treating. Hopefully the weather will hold out...there's an 80% chance of rain tomorrow.

I'm sick of the rain!!!

It does nothing to lift my spirits and gives me a headache!

Buddy got neutered last Thursday the 22nd. He did great until Friday evening when he licked the glue off his incision. That bought him some staples and this lampshade around his head.




He got his staple out today (there was only one left because he somehow pulled out the other two!) and the lampshade will come off tomorrow. He's SO cute. He's a pain in the hiney at times, but I can't tell you how much I've grown to love this dog!



Love,
Tonya

Nostalgia

Fall has always been my favorite time of year.

Until now.

I still love the cool weather. I love the vibrant colors of the leaves turning from green to orange, red and yellow. I love Saturdays spend in front of the fire watching Georgia Bulldog football with a big pot of chili on the stove. I love bundling up in a sweatshirt. I love the sound of the furnace coming on early in the mornings because of the chill outside.

But it's all different this year.

As the cool air blows in, so are the memories of this time last year.

I was so happy and pregnant. Uncomfortable, yes, but thankful to be so close to having my baby boy in my arms. My body welcomed the cooler weather, desperately needing a break from the heat and humidity of a Georgia summer. I shopped for just a few more maternity clothes to get me through the last few weeks of pregnancy. I stayed home on Halloween because I was too big to be walking around and Emma Grace was sick with a fever. I greeted everyone at the door and loved questions by moms about when I was due? Boy or girl? I was working on getting my thank you notes written....getting the nursery ready....trying to find some gowns that snapped down the front that would be easy to nurse in for a long time....

Some people in my life would tell me not to think about it. Just to let it go.

But if you've been through a tragic loss or difficult time in your life, you can't not think about it. In fact, you don't consciously say, "I'm going to think about that today". Those thoughts and feelings just creep in.

They're a part of you. Forever. Like it or not.

I was thinking last night that no matter what I do and how hard I try, the sorrow and sadness seep through my best intentions to hide it.

This may be a stupid analogy, but it's kind of like a wound and a band aid. Even though the wound is covered, the blood often seeps into the band aid. The blood doesn't penetrate the band aid. But it can be seen through the covering.

It may not seem so, based on my blogs lately, but I promise that I do have happy times in my life.

Like the fact that I was overjoyed when Jessica made three runs the other night by sliding into home.

I was thrilled and blessed to talk to my blog, and now real-life, friend Sara for 3 1/2 hours Saturday night.

I delight in my living children every day. Especially moments like this morning when Emma Grace popped right into my arms when I woke her up, and we snuggled a bit before getting dressed.

I was touched beyond belief that my friend and neighbor, Jenny, lit a candle for Grady on October 15th and put it outside for me to see. Just so I would know they remember him.

I was so thankful for those who came to the Walk to Remember in honor of Grady. (I promise a whole post on that with pictures coming soon)

It made my heart skip when my husband emailed me to say that he thanks God for me every day.

The sunset the other night was possibly the most beautiful, breath-taking sight I've ever seen. Only God could create something so spectacular.

I DO have happy times in my life. I DO delight in the small things.

But this time of year is especially hard right now, and I'm doing my best to hang in there. Thanks for hanging in there with me. I could really use your prayers.

Love,
Tonya

A Mommy in Heaven

*Warning: if you are pregnant, you might want to skip this post*

I've met a new friend through the preschool. I won't disclose her name, but we'll call her L. L and I started talking one morning. She needed to view her oldest son's beautiful picture on the computer. I had my blog pulled up (to listen to the music) and had to close it so we could see the picture. I told her a little about Grady, she asked for my blog link and the next thing I knew, she and her husband had visited my blog.

We have emailed several times since, and we've talked briefly at preschool. She has not been in the exact same situation as me, losing a baby, but she does have a baby boy with special needs. Her grief and heartache is different, but yet the same as mine, in so many ways.

She seems like a wonderful Christian woman who has been praying for me. And I can tell she's a sincere prayer....you know the kind I'm talking about. One who will really pray for you if they say they have been or will.

I got an email from her a couple of nights ago that I just can't get off my mind.

L. was so sweet in prefacing that she does not pretend to know what I'm going through and has been praying for me. But a thought wouldn't leave her mind. She apologized if it would bring me more pain and hurt, but she wanted to share it with me.

And I'm so glad she did because I have never once thought of it in the past year.

She said that she couldn't help picturing Grady, with his beautiful rosey red lips, in the arms of a mommy who didn't make it through childbirth. A mommy who wanted so badly to hold her unborn baby.

It touched my heart and made me jealous all at the same time.

I was comforted that Grady might have filled a void (are there any voids in heaven? probably not, but I'll proceed) for a mommy who didn't get to hold her own baby. But I was jealous that someone else got to hold him first.

I have always pictured my mom as the one who welcomed Grady at the gates of heaven and led him to see the Father. And I feel that she did. But then she might have taken him to see some special woman who needed to hold him.

Just a thought. Something that I can't get out of my mind either. It truly does bring me more comfort than anything else....

I was even jealous that my mom and the others got to hold him before I did. Well, kind of they did. I held him alive in my womb and his flesh in my arms after he died. But someone else held him healthy and whole in their arms first.

I'm holding fast to the hope and promise that I will get to do that one day, too!

Love,
Tonya

Preaching To The Choir

I really have about ten other things I should be doing right now, mainly sleeping, but I wanted to blog. It really is such an outlet for me. For everything, not just Grady.

I'm not often short-winded, as you well know, but I'm going to try tonight, so I can go to bed!

For many of you, I'm gonna be "preachin' to the choir"!

This has been one of those days where I can totally see how a stay-at-home mom (SAHM) can earn over $100,000 a year!

Even though I'm not completely a SAHM because I do earn a paycheck every month, albeit a small one, it's a paycheck none the less!

Here's a rundown of my day:

4:15am: hubby gets up to shower.

4:45am: hubby informs me that Buddy is too tired to get out of his crate to go outside and he tells me bye.

5:40am: alarm goes off, and even though I didn't really go back to sleep after hubby left, I still don't want to get up.

5:55 - 6:15am: hop out of bed and hurry to shower and dry hair (forget the make-up right now...no time for that!)

6:15 - 6:25am: make coffee and start waking up girls (quick get online to check blog, email and school lunch menus)

6:25am: turn girls' overhead lights on to further wake them up and put their clothes in the dryer to warm them (yes, they're a bit spoiled!)

6:25 - 6:45am: take Buddy out, fill water bottles, keep checking on girls, sign agendas, get breakfast ready to be heated.

6:45am: DRAG Emma Grace out of bed and hurry her along as best I can to get dressed.

7:00am: load everyone, including the dog, into the van to head to school.

7:00 - 7:40am: sit and make my way through two car pool lines that are about two miles from my house (that's how bad the traffic is!)

7:40 - 7:50am: type a letter to go home in Jessica's classmates' agendas

7:50 - 8:10am: go get my friend and neighbor from taking her car to be serviced.

8:10 - 8:45am: get chicken in crock pot, flat-iron hair, put on make-up, take Buddy out again and crate him up.

8:45 - 9:15am: make copies at Jessica's school and try to sort some things out about the Fall Festival this weekend.

9:15am - 1:45pm: go shopping with a wonderfully sweet mom from Jessica's class for our class basket that will be silent-auctioned at the Fall Festival.

1:45 - 2:10pm: report back to Jessica's teacher about the basket and answer questions about the festival.

2:10 - 2:40pm: sit in car pool line to get Emma Grace and come home.

3 - 3:30pm: Jessica comes home, stand outside talking to neighbor.

3:30pm - 4:30pm: on the phone taking care of festival details while girls do homework and play outside.

4:30 - 5pm: bathe Buddy because he needs to be fresh and clean for his surgery tomorrow - he's getting *fixed*!

5pm - 6pm: dinner prep and still on phone about festival.

*****somewhere in there, I put a load of laundry in the washer and one in dryer*****

6:15ish: Jessica realizes that she left her catching mitt at the ball field last night.... wake Gib up from his sound slumber (must be nice!) to take her to look while I finish dinner.

****While they are gone, I try to do a little kitchen clean-up and make the mistake of pushing my carrot and potato peels down the garbage disposal. Don't know if this was a mistake in general or if I shoved them too quickly, but the result was not good. BIG CLOG! ****

6:30pm: Gib and Jessica are back with no mitt. Tell Gib about clog. Of course I should have waited until after dinner because he has to take care of it right away.

6:30 - 7:30pm: Gib is working on garbage disposal while girls and I enjoy a delicious dinner of chicken, mashed potatoes and roasted carrots. In the meantime, Gib tries to use the plunger and gets a face full of carrot-and-potato-peel-water. (He's really not happy now, but he always amazes me with his self-control when he's angry) He takes the pipes apart under the sink, we find the clog, unclog it with a broom handle (crazy) and guess who's left with the clean-up?

Yep.

7:30pm - 10:30pm: finish helping Jessica with homework; take Buddy out twice; clean the kitchen, including under the sink, around the sink, and the mop bucket; put dishes in dishwasher; hand wash other dishes; more laundry; and load fall basket items in my van to take to wrap tomorrow (Jessica did help me with that).

10:30 - 11pm: send out some emails about festival and decide that I really need to blog about my day.

Thanks for reading. I know I was just "preachin' to the choir" to all of you other busy moms out there. I cannot tell you how much I admire those of you who work a full-time job and keep your household running. Kudos to you! I get completely overwhelmed just trying to do the things I do. One day, sooner or later, I will enter the full-time working world and then I'll be asking for tips from all of you who do it every day!

BTW, this took me MUCH longer than I thought it would! (it is now 11:50!) AND, Jessica's coach sent out an email....they have her glove.

Goodnight! (Shoot, I forgot I have to take Buddy out again)

Love,
Tonya

Too Tired

Well friends, I have so much to say, but I'm honestly too tired. I almost fell asleep while Jessica was reading to me. I pulled my *freezing* self out of her warm bed to come rinse the dinner dishes because I'm just too tired to unload the dishwasher. I know it only takes on average four minutes, but they'll just have to wait. I hate it because I feel like I start my day already behind to walk into a kitchen with dirty, leftover dishes first thing in the morning. But so-be-it.

I came to check my email one last time and to catch up on some blog reading. I wasn't going to blog at all, but it's been a few days, and I don't like to go much longer than that without something. Honestly, I'm just trying to pass a little more time to give Buddy's bladder some more time to accumulate a little more pee before taking him out for the last time.

How's that for too much information???

I promise I will post pictures of the Walk to Remember in honor of Grady very soon. It was a beautiful day. Chilly and windy, but sunny and beautiful.

The weather has suddenly turned cold here. Nostalgia is setting in. Things are so different from this time last year. My then very-pregnant-self welcomed this colder air. Not this year. That's a post in-and-of itself.

I'm keeping it short tonight. Off to take Buddy out and to bed. Gib's clock goes off at 4am every morning, and I don't really go back to sleep after that. I feel a hundred years old going to bed so early. I used to be such a night owl. Not anymore. You gotta do whatcha gotta do!

Nighty-night.

Love,
Tonya

Remembering Them - October 15th

In case you didn't already know, October is *awareness* month for just about everything. I think it's great, but there is one category that I honestly didn't know existed until Grady died.

Pregnancy and infant loss.

Not only is October pregnancy and infant loss awareness month, October 15th is National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day.

It was passed in 1988 by Ronald Reagan, but very few people know about it. This is a website where you can learn more if you're interested.

Everyone is asked to light a candle in memory of the babies at 7pm in all time zones and keep it burning for one hour. If everyone does this, there will be a continuous wave of light over the entire world on October 15th. (I'm not smart enough to figure that out for myself...I'm just trusting what the website states!)

I will definitely be lighting a candle for my Baby Grady tomorrow night. Call me crazy but even if Jessica's softball game doesn't get cancelled due to rain, I most certainly will have his candle with me at the ball field to light at 7pm. I don't care what anyone thinks of me. I can handle the strange looks. And, honey, bring on the questions!

That's what it's all about - awareness! It is so true that too many parents grieve in silence.

Awkward silence.

I will also be wearing an intertwined pink and blue ribbon pinned to my shirt all day tomorrow, which I'm sure will bring about questions. I think Gib is going to wear one and the girls too. That makes my heart H-A-P-P-Y!

We won't be the only ones lighting a candle for Baby Grady tomorrow night. My sister-in-law emailed to tell me that they will be doing the same thing to remember him tomorrow evening. They just had a baby boy in August, and it touches my heart beyond words for them to show that kind of love for us and for Grady. Thank you Shannon, Arthur, Kylie and Collin.

If you feel led and think about it, would you light a candle, too?

One more thing...my candle won't just be for Grady. It will represent all of your precious babies who went to be with the Lord way too soon (at least according to our plans).

Love,
Tonya

11 Months

The title says it all. Today was 11 months since Grady made his physical entrance into this world.

Still and silent.

I have nothing new to say.

Nothing profound.

No new revelations.

Just the same old stuff...

I miss him.

I love him.

I remember him.

I will never forget him.

I will carry him in my heart forever.

Love,
Tonya

Fragile Faith

So, our sermon today brought about some raw emotions for me.

First, I almost did the ugly cry in church. That is until I gathered my wits and excused myself to the restroom. Which is a very long walk. Much longer when you're crying!

It started when we were singing a modernized version of "It Is Well With My Soul".

Have I ever told you how that song touches my heart? If not, I'll have to do that sometime.

I was singing, "It is well,it is well. Through the storm, I am held. It is well, it is well with my soul".

Another verse, "Whatever my lot, thou hast taught me to say, it is well, it is well with my soul".

The part that always gets me is when we sing, "And Lord haste the day, when thy faith shall be sight. The clouds be rolled back as the scroll. The trump shall resound and the Lord shall descend. Even so, it is well with my soul". I was holding my *Grady* charm on my necklace, singing with all my heart and soul to the Lord.

The very next song/verse we sang was "Soon and very soon, we are going to see the King".

Can I tell you how I long for that day?!?!

Because when I see the King, I will also see my Baby Grady. And my mom. And my dad. And my Momaw. And my Popaw. And my Nana.

I can't imagine what that moment will be like. I am teary-eyed as I type this because of the amazing, glorious moment that will be!

The song, "I Can Only Imagine" comes to mind....."Will I stand in your presence, or to my feet will I fall, will I sing hallelujah, will I be able to speak at all? I can only imagine"...

I don't know what I'll do. But it will be the most glorious moment EVER!

...so, on to *Fragile Faith*.

I've never thought of my faith as *fragile* until today.

But it was made clear to me during our sermon, that I had *fragile faith* or *circumstantial faith*, and it made my heart sad.

Very sad.

You see, when Grady died, I didn't immediately turn to God for help and comfort.

I turned my back on God.

Friends, that is VERY hard for me to type.

Judge me as you want. Relate to me if you can. But it's the plain and simple truth.

And it wasn't just from losing Grady. It was from the other pain and heartache I've experienced. I felt like if God really loved me, He wouldn't allow more pain, and pain to that depth, into my life.

I loved Him. I believed in Him. I trusted Him with Grady's life. I believed that He would bring Grady safely into this world and into our arms, home and lives.

He didn't do that, though. He allowed this pain into my life, and I turned my back on Him. So much so that I questioned if He was real? If He even existed?

And PRAISE THE LORD, He revealed Himself to me. I came full-circle. And I am SO thankful!

Because God is still good. God is still real. God is still all-knowing. God is still all-powerful. God is still on the throne.

Despite my loss. Despite my heartache. God is still there. Loving me. Holding me. Guiding me.

He is still here.

And I love Him. And I believe in Him. And I trust Him.

In the moments when I felt most alone, He was the closest. In the moments when I felt like He had abandoned me, He was there.

And I truly believe that He knows best. Even if it means living my earthly life without my Baby Grady. And the others whom I love so much.

But, just as I had in my first breakthrough, I am so thankful that because of Jesus and his life and death and resurrection, I WILL see my Baby Grady again. Because he was innocent and without sin and his soul went straight from his earthly body in my womb into the arms of Jesus.

And because they believed and trusted in Jesus as their Savior, I WILL see my mom, dad, Momaw, Popaw, and Nana.

PRAISE BE TO GOD!

And let me make one thing clear...

Just because my faith was *fragile* or *circumstantial* before...I can assure you that it is not now.

Because if God can bring me through the death of one of my children, I fully and whole-heartedly believe that He can bring me through anything!!!

Love,
Tonya

Great Advice

I read some great advice recently that I want to share with you.

Not long after Grady died, my friend Amy brought us dinner. As we were talking, I learned that she had visited Molly Piper's blog to learn more about stillbirth and the grief that goes along with it. Not only did she visit her blog, she forwarded it to some of our other friends as well. This touched me that she would take the time to dig a little deeper into my loss, but I had honestly never heard of Molly Piper. Amy sent me the link, and I checked it out.

It was the first blog I visited after lGrady died. She had great information for friends but also for grieving mommies. It made me feel less alone, which is exactly what I needed. A couple of months later, through Molly's blog, I met my now "real life friend", Ebe. It's amazing what a small world we live in and how such loss can bring people strangers together.

Molly visited my blog the other day when I wrote this post about "A Nagging Feeling". I can't tell you how much it means to have other people relate to and validate what I'm feeling. She referred to what I was experiencing as "subconscious grieving". This couldn't be more true.

Molly's most recent post was about how a friend, an unmarried man, gave her a book. He didn't just give her the book. He read the book first! This made her feel loved beyond just the gift. He read it to understand more of what she was going through. Her point was that giving books is a great idea, but take the time to read it yourself before handing it over. You may feel like you're giving your friend or loved one something great, but if you haven't checked it out first, you might think twice. I believe you should take this approach with any life situation/struggle someone is dealing with, not just stillbirth/grief. What a great way to really show love to others!

Thanks for the great advice Molly! I'm definitely going to take this to heart!

I hope you will, too.

Love,
Tonya

Walks

Just in case you've been wondering...which you probably weren't...but just in case you were...

I completed my 30 miles for the Atlanta breast cancer walk!

Now for those of you in super-good-tip-top shape you might not bat an eyelash at that. But for me, it was a huge accomplishment! I didn't train at all and was honestly worried that I might not complete it. But I did! Hurray!

We started out downtown at the Atlanta Marriott at 7:30 Saturday morning. We walked to Agnes Scott College for lunch, and then proceeded through the Emory University campus, through Virginia Highlands, back to the Atlanta Marriott. My little group finished right at 4pm.

We had a nice dinner at the hotel provided by the walk and were in bed by 9pm. We were pooped!

Sunday morning, we headed out again at 7:30am from the Marriott. We walked by Underground Atlanta, through the scattered Georgia State University campus and finished around 11:15am after 10 miles at Zoo Atlanta. We walked through parts of Atlanta that I never knew existed and probably will never see again in my life.

My foot did great for the first 10 miles of the walk. It wasn't until after lunch Saturday that it started really hurting. I hobbled and finished. My friends were so sweet to hang behind with me. I was extremely sore Sunday. Muscles that I never knew got a work out with walking hurt. Amazingly, I only got one blister and didn't get it until about an hour into the walk on Sunday. We all pushed through the pain and crossed the finish line with linked arms. It was an amazing experience, and I'm SO glad I did it! Many thanks to those who sponsored me and also to my "NICU Family" for asking me to join them! I don't have a group picture yet, but I will post it as soon as I do. (I didn't take my camera because it is not small and I didn't want to have to keep up with it while walking.)

But, I did have Gib take some pictures of me when I got home Sunday.







--------------------

There's another walk that I want to talk about this morning. It is called the Atlanta Walk to Remember. This is an annual walk hosted by Northside Hospital that is being held on Sunday, October 18th at 2pm. The pamphlet describes it as "an annual gathering of parents, families, friends, and health care providers as part of National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month. There is a short ceremony, a symbolic 'walk' around a park, and a balloon release". It is open to the public, and your loss did not have to occur at Northside to attend.

We will be there this year. My friend, Robin, wanted us to get a team together to walk for the March of Dimes in honor of Grady. I told her I'd rather support this walk simply because of its focus. The March of Dimes is a wonderful organization, and if we were walking for Emma Grace, I would jump on it. But because it is in honor of Grady, this is much more appropriate.

I am partial to this Walk to Remember because they are the ones who sponsored me to go to the RTS Bereavement training in March. (In case you've never read about my mission, you can click here to learn more) This walk is free to attend and is not a fundraiser. "It is a time of remembrance and healing and to promote community awareness. Any money that is raised through donations or other means is used to fund future walks and to provide bereavement training to health care workers" (Caring and Coping, Volume 13, Number 1). There is a silent auction, t-shirt sales, car magnet sales, etc. but you pay no money to attend.

If you live in the Atlanta area, have lost a baby and would like to attend, please visit this website to register and learn more about the walk. Let me know if you will be attending and maybe we can meet up! This is a short walk (about 15 minutes) around the Concourse Corporate Center, nothing strenuous like I just completed!

Have a great day!

Love,
Tonya

A Nagging Feeling

Something just hasn't been right today.

All day.

I couldn't put my finger on it. All day, I've been thinking about October 5th. Feeling like it was an important date. I've checked my calendar a few times to make sure that I haven't missed anything. I didn't miss a birthday. It wasn't a special holiday. I only had one appointment which I kept.

It has nagged me and driven me crazy. So much so that I pulled out my 2008 calendar just to see what might have been going on today a year ago.

Why did this date stand out in my head and why was my heart so heavy today?

When I read it, my heart sank.

A very important event took place one year ago.

And I found these...




And these...this was me a year ago today...







Finally an answer as to why I've been feeling so down today. It's hard to believe that just a year ago I was feeling excitement and anticipation, but I'm typing with such sadness just one year later.

The gifts unused. Sitting in drawers and hanging in the closet untouched.

It was this day, the day of my first baby shower for Grady, that I finally let myself be excited. It actually felt real that we would bring our baby home with us. I let myself believe it. We had passed the scare of extreme prematurity. All was well.

Or so we thought.

Still, all is well...

With my soul. With Grady's soul.

But not with my heart. At least not the part that belongs to Grady. It is broken and grieving and sad and torn apart tonight.

Love,
Tonya

Singing, Swinging and Strolling

I love christian music. But I also love country music. And pop. And rock. And, well, I just love music. Especially if it has a good beat!

If you need a good pick-me-up, you need to listen to the new hit by the Black-Eyed Peas called "I Gotta Feeling". That's exactly what I did last night.

Yesterday was just a hard day emotionally. I'm working with some friends on the Atlanta Walk to Remember which is on October 18th. I contacted a t-shirt company about a design and just had Grady on my mind SO much. Just one of those days where I missed him so much my heart hurt.

Literally.

So, on the way to Jessica's softball game, "I Gotta Feeling" came on the radio. The girls and I turned the radio up, way up, and sang as loud as we could. "I gotta feeling, that tonight's gonna be a good night, that tonight's gonna be a good, good night....."

It lifted my spirits a little and a good night it was!

Jessica had a GREAT game! Her first time up to bat, she made her very first hit! She was so shocked that she just stood there. After everyone was screaming at her to run, she took off and made it safely to first base. She got to second and the inning was over.

Her next time up to bat she made another hit! This time she didn't hesitate at all. She took off as fast as she could to first. She got to third, and the inning was over.

She played second base last night and had two great plays. She tagged a girl out and threw the ball to her back-up for an out.

She had a grin from ear to ear! A friend of mine took some pictures that I will post when I get them.

On the way home last night, I thought it would be cool if "I Gotta Feeling" was on again. I checked that radio station, and guess what? It was! We sang our hearts out and jammed on the way home again. Fun! Fun!

I leave this afternoon for my breast cancer walk. My foot is better, but I have to admit that I'm a bit worried. It is still sore. It hurts when I first get up in the mornings and when I wiggle my toes. I thought the walk was forty miles, but it's only thirty. Twenty miles on Saturday and ten on Sunday. Hopefully I can make it! I'm gonna give it my best shot anyway. And I'm not even sure I'll be walking. I think strolling will be a much better way to describe it! We're not trying to break any records. Just looking forward to the experience and meeting other people.

That's all I have today about singing, swinging and strolling. I hope you all have a great weekend! As always, thanks for stopping by! And a BIG thanks to all of you who let me know you visit my blog! Thank you! Thank you!

"See ya" soon!

Love,
Tonya